Well, looks like its all going ahead. I'm moving to London! Well the decision has been made to go, Fiona has accepted the job and I now need to find one myself. In times of this recession rubbish, its going to be easier said than done. Got a friend helping me fine tune my CV to make it seem worthwhile to pay me £30,000 for a job that there's probably hundreds of other applicatants for. Lets face it, I'm a 22 year old firl with no degree but a lot of determination, ambition and a major drive to get something out of my life. I dont want a family in the foreseeable future so I want a career, staying where I am now isn't going to cut it. Plus I think the time has come to 'find myself', if I cant do it in an unknown city as big as London where I know only the person I'm going with then I guess I cant do it anywhere!
Mum's already having a bit of a sulk at me for planning on moving so far away, she wants us all to stay at home so she knows where we are. Clearly cant get to grips with the fact that we're all grown up now and its unusual that we're all still single and living at home. Bless her.
So, the move will probably be August time. So I've got 3 months to find a job, a house, figure out London's transport systems, save money for a deposit and first months rent, plan moving my enitre life to somewhere I've visitied for no more than a weekend and get to grips with the unknown of it all.
This is all on top of the worry that living with Fiona's 7 year old boy is going to be very very hard. I'm not the biggest fan of children, especially small boys and I like my space and my quiet. When there's a child in the house, this aint going to happen. I know Fiona will make him aware of everything he needs to be, so he won't run riot but its still the biggest thing that is worrying me.
The positives of it all is a fresh start, I am so looking forward to going to places I've never been to before, meeting people who know nothing about me, who've never dated my sister, friend or mother. I cant wait to go somewhere where I can be me. Not Amy's sister, not the girl that lives in that house full of women round the corner, not the girl that is friends with so-and-so.
I will be me.
Whoever I find that to be.
I'm also very excited to meet new men, ones who I don't have to worry about who they already know. the amount of times I've been out with the girls and eyed up a man to find that one or 2 of my friends have already slpet with him. In London that aint going to happen.
I absolutely cannot wait.
I can be me and I intend for that me to be the very best I can be. I want a job to be proud of and now that I've joined the gym, a body to be proud of and a vigure for life.
I will be the optomisitc girl I was at 18.
No one to make me feel like the fatty of the household, the vain girl of the office and the sister of the girl who dates (and sleeps with) a lot of men.
A whole new me. Improved.